Alright, I must confess that with our move there is one bathroom in our house that has been neglected...the boy's bathroom. It is downstairs near their room and over the past month I have overlooked it, not intentionally, but life is busy with seven children and many boxes to unpack.
A few days ago I decided to conquer the bathroom. I donned latex gloves and gathered my cleaning supplies. I tackled the sink first and then went on to clean the shower. To my surprise there was no soap. It wasn't that the soap had been all used up...there was no evidence that soap had ever been in the shower!
I called two of my preteen boys to the bathroom. "Where is the soap you have been using during the past month?" Their response was simply, "There wasn't any in there so we didn't use any." My mouth dropped open as I said, "You haven't used any soap in a month!?" They just shrugged their shoulders and smiled. I quickly opened the bathroom closet door and showed them the two neatly boxed bars of soap just waiting to be used.
"When you take a shower use soap...every time. If it is gone ask me and I will get you some more." They nodded, smiled and left the bathroom. I thought, "Surely my teenage son has his own soap that he has stashed away after each shower." After the same line of questioning I discovered the results were the same...no soap!
Isn't is interesting? For a whole month they have simply rinsed off and thought it was good enough. They knew about the soap because they are the ones that actually put it in the closet after I bought it. They have been taught how to take a shower but they didn't take the time to go to the closet, open the door, take out the box of soap, put it in the shower and use it.
Hmmm...I wonder how much of my life has been similar this past month regarding my time with the Lord. I know I need time with God, I know where my Bible is, I know what I need to do in order to have a "quiet" time in my home but somehow the distractions of life have crept into my life. Okay, I haven't gone a whole month without a quiet time, but I also haven't spent the time bathing in the Word of God and letting His Spirit cleanse me from the inside out. More often than not I've had a "rinsing" rather than a "cleansing". So often I've gone through the motions to check it off my list, rather than going with a heart ready to hear from the Lord.
I'm not thankful that my boys have gone so long without a proper scrubbing, but I am thankful for the ways that God uses the ordinary things of this life to teach me more about Himself. We all learned a lesson from this one!
Showing posts with label teenagers. Show all posts
Showing posts with label teenagers. Show all posts
Tuesday, November 3, 2009
Tuesday, October 27, 2009
Teenagers and Toddlers
A few weeks ago God spoke to me through my baby crying...
I was praying for wisdom with what to do with one of my teenagers. Our cross country move had been God's plan but one of our children was having a very difficult time and I knew that keeping God's word fresh in her life would be best. A friend had told me about the evening Bible Study Fellowship class in town and that there was also a student study. I decided to join and to bring my school aged kids so they could be in the word, and hopefully make some new friends as well.
When I told my daughter about it she wasn't excited. In fact, she said, "I don't want to go!" I told her to pray about it and listen for God to speak to her. (Inwardly I thought I would be off the hook because of course God would want her to go.)
In the morning I asked her what God had said about the study. Her reply was neutral. "He didn't say yes or no." Now I was in a dilemma. I wanted her to go but I didn't want to force it. I began to pray and after lunchtime I put my 18-month old down for a nap and thought I'd get in some quality alone time with God to sit and pray.
And then the crying began...
Actually, it was more of an all out fit. The storm in that little bedroom could be heard throughout the entire house. My little one had decided that she was not happy about a nap and there was no way she was going to take one. I tried all my parenting ideas but nothing worked. The crying intensified and my frustration grew.
I went in to her room and calmly said, "I am the Mom and I know what is best for you. You might not want to take a nap but you need one. You need to stay in here and be quiet."
As I walked out of the room and shut the door it was as if God spoke directly to my heart about what to do with my teenager. "You are the Mom and you know what is best for her right now. She is fighting with what is best for her right now just like the baby. Stay strong and do what is right."
I was so thankful for my baby crying and for God using an ordinary day to teach me that I could hear His voice in the midst of chaos!
I was praying for wisdom with what to do with one of my teenagers. Our cross country move had been God's plan but one of our children was having a very difficult time and I knew that keeping God's word fresh in her life would be best. A friend had told me about the evening Bible Study Fellowship class in town and that there was also a student study. I decided to join and to bring my school aged kids so they could be in the word, and hopefully make some new friends as well.
When I told my daughter about it she wasn't excited. In fact, she said, "I don't want to go!" I told her to pray about it and listen for God to speak to her. (Inwardly I thought I would be off the hook because of course God would want her to go.)
In the morning I asked her what God had said about the study. Her reply was neutral. "He didn't say yes or no." Now I was in a dilemma. I wanted her to go but I didn't want to force it. I began to pray and after lunchtime I put my 18-month old down for a nap and thought I'd get in some quality alone time with God to sit and pray.
And then the crying began...
Actually, it was more of an all out fit. The storm in that little bedroom could be heard throughout the entire house. My little one had decided that she was not happy about a nap and there was no way she was going to take one. I tried all my parenting ideas but nothing worked. The crying intensified and my frustration grew.
I went in to her room and calmly said, "I am the Mom and I know what is best for you. You might not want to take a nap but you need one. You need to stay in here and be quiet."
As I walked out of the room and shut the door it was as if God spoke directly to my heart about what to do with my teenager. "You are the Mom and you know what is best for her right now. She is fighting with what is best for her right now just like the baby. Stay strong and do what is right."
I was so thankful for my baby crying and for God using an ordinary day to teach me that I could hear His voice in the midst of chaos!
Sunday, August 23, 2009
Caught
As a mom I have often prayed that if my children were doing something they shouldn't be doing that they would be caught in the act. Many times God has answered these prayers. Although it has been awhile since I have voiced that prayer, it is a prayer that God still answers...
Just last week while I was preparing for a friend to arrive I walked to the closet to put some things away. I noticed a folded piece of paper lying on the floor inside the closet. "It looks like someone just tossed this in here." I thought to myself. I unfolded the piece of computer paper and was immediately saddened. It had a picture that had obviously been downloaded and printed from the internet. One of my sons had gone to a place he shouldn't have been on the computer and printed off an image that was inappropriate.
"Give me wisdom, Oh Lord, as I confront my son" I whispered as I went looking for him. During those moments as I waited for him to arrive God gave me an incredible peace. Yes, I was heartbroken for him and his sin, but I was also thankful that God had opened the door for him to be caught so this sin could be dealt with now, rather than be allowed to grow in secret and silence.
"John*, I am going to ask you something, " I said as I spoke to him, "And I want your word that you will be completely honest with me." He agreed and I went on. "Have you been anywhere on the computer where you shouldn't have been?" His gaze went from my face to the floor and then he noticed that I had a folded piece of paper under my arm. "I guess you already know that I have since you have that paper. I was going to throw it away and talk to Joe* about it." (Joe is an older young man that my son had been on a youth retreat with several months earlier. Joe is a godly young man. During the retreat he had been very open about the struggles to remain pure in this generation with pornography so easy to access through the internet.)
I was thankful that John was not defensive, that he felt bad about what he had done, and that he had a plan to confess his sin to another person. As we spoke further I asked how he came upon this picture. He had not gone looking for it. He was searching for answers to his school assignment for a particular country. When he clicked on the link for the country there were models along the side. So, right there he had a choice to click on the model or to look away.
As a mom it saddens my heart to know that even though we have put safeguards in place, temptations will seek out my sons. The devil does "prowl around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour." Pornography is a sin that can destroy the hearts and lives of men. As parents we not only need to put safeguards in place, but we need to train them what to do when the temptation comes looking for them.
In this day of easy internet access (even through cell phones) we need to train our children how to handle the temptation. They need to know how to flee from it and how to confess it to another person if they stumble. We also need to continue to press into their lives and ask them tough questions and check up on things like the internet history on our computer to see what sites have been visited. "Trust but verify" is a favorite slogan of my husband. To think, "My son (or daughter) would never do such a thing" is to set your child up for failure. Teach them righteousness, but train them for the battle so they can stand firm in this day of temptation.
*names changed
Just last week while I was preparing for a friend to arrive I walked to the closet to put some things away. I noticed a folded piece of paper lying on the floor inside the closet. "It looks like someone just tossed this in here." I thought to myself. I unfolded the piece of computer paper and was immediately saddened. It had a picture that had obviously been downloaded and printed from the internet. One of my sons had gone to a place he shouldn't have been on the computer and printed off an image that was inappropriate.
"Give me wisdom, Oh Lord, as I confront my son" I whispered as I went looking for him. During those moments as I waited for him to arrive God gave me an incredible peace. Yes, I was heartbroken for him and his sin, but I was also thankful that God had opened the door for him to be caught so this sin could be dealt with now, rather than be allowed to grow in secret and silence.
"John*, I am going to ask you something, " I said as I spoke to him, "And I want your word that you will be completely honest with me." He agreed and I went on. "Have you been anywhere on the computer where you shouldn't have been?" His gaze went from my face to the floor and then he noticed that I had a folded piece of paper under my arm. "I guess you already know that I have since you have that paper. I was going to throw it away and talk to Joe* about it." (Joe is an older young man that my son had been on a youth retreat with several months earlier. Joe is a godly young man. During the retreat he had been very open about the struggles to remain pure in this generation with pornography so easy to access through the internet.)
I was thankful that John was not defensive, that he felt bad about what he had done, and that he had a plan to confess his sin to another person. As we spoke further I asked how he came upon this picture. He had not gone looking for it. He was searching for answers to his school assignment for a particular country. When he clicked on the link for the country there were models along the side. So, right there he had a choice to click on the model or to look away.
As a mom it saddens my heart to know that even though we have put safeguards in place, temptations will seek out my sons. The devil does "prowl around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour." Pornography is a sin that can destroy the hearts and lives of men. As parents we not only need to put safeguards in place, but we need to train them what to do when the temptation comes looking for them.
In this day of easy internet access (even through cell phones) we need to train our children how to handle the temptation. They need to know how to flee from it and how to confess it to another person if they stumble. We also need to continue to press into their lives and ask them tough questions and check up on things like the internet history on our computer to see what sites have been visited. "Trust but verify" is a favorite slogan of my husband. To think, "My son (or daughter) would never do such a thing" is to set your child up for failure. Teach them righteousness, but train them for the battle so they can stand firm in this day of temptation.
*names changed
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